I dedicate this site to the memory of my stepdaughter, Heather, who was murdered on Thanksgiving 2017. I want to chronicle some of the events and spiritual insights that happened. It is my hope that this may help some other souls who stumble upon this site. Maybe some good can come off this after all (read more here).  ~ May 2018

Heather: I am always here, just listen for my voice

6/16/2019 8:40 a.m.

Today is father’s day, US version, we already had the German one… So sitting outside, had breakfast, wonderful sunny day, couldn’t be nicer.  Don’t want to lead a dialogue today, just let it flow, see if anything, including nothing happens, of if anybody from my connections wants to come through.

Guidance:  Who would you like to come through?

Me: Oh, you know, Heather.
Heather:  I am here, Hanns.

Me:  Why have I heard so little from you?
Heather:  Because you were busy, with “other voices.”

Me:  I always called for you.
Heather: I have always been here.  What would you like to talk about?

Me:  Oh, I thought, this time I don’t lead.
Heather: Well,  Hanns [...], you just have to lead (and ask questions), that’s just the way it is.

Me:  OK, so about you! Where are you?  How are you?  ….  Are you here?
Heather:  Yes, I am.  It is all so funny to me.

Me: What?
Heather:  This constant wondering about where and how.  Because "where" is a spatial thing.  And “here,” Ha!, there is no space, we are everywhere and nowhere, any time, and no-time, you know?   As far as how, now that is a different aspect.  We simply are, how could anything timeless be anything different.  Or, we are like this and that, and all and nothing.  We can be any way, just snap to it.

Me:  How is this helping mom?
Heather: Just to know I am always with her.  If she can just see and know that, it would be so helpful to her.

Me:  But she just misses you.  Wants to hold you and talk to you.
Heather: Missing is the feeling of separation, of being apart from that what you love.  We are never apart, though, she just concentrates on an aspect of me, the physical aspect, and us talking.  The talking she can just have at any moment.  The physical is just, and she needs to realize this, candy on top.  Alas, the physical is gone, the mental is here forever.

Me:  Am I making this up?
Heather:  You are being a doubter, Hanns.  That’s why this is so much harder. Just wait between the sentences and let me voice come through.  Because, you know my voice IS there, but when you write this, you sort of dictate this, and then my voice disappears.

Me:  You are right, I can really hear you.
Heather:  Of course, I am always here to help.  But this writing really slows you down.  Well, I don’t have a different way for you; either listen, then write;  or just listen;  or you just trust that whatever comes through is me.

Me:  I really like to hear your voice.
Heather:  Because it’s confirmation.

Me:  Yes.
Heather:  So let’s just do it that way,  listen-write,   listen-write.

Me:  Or we could just try this automatic writing.
Heather:  Not sure if that would work with you, but we could try.   [Nothing…]   It’s not your way.

[stopped now, start to meditate, a few thoughts]

[Later I had this thought:]

Me:   What can mom do?
Heather:  Well, that’s for her to find out.  If I tell you, you would  not interpret it as her .

Namaste — I bow to you and the Divine in you.

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