I dedicate this site to the memory of my stepdaughter, Heather, who was murdered on Thanksgiving 2017. I want to chronicle some of the events and spiritual insights that happened. It is my hope that this may help some other souls who stumble upon this site. Maybe some good can come off this after all (read more here).  ~ May 2018

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The Gnats of Everyday: Dealing with the Invariant Issues of Life

The Gnats of Everyday: dealing with the invariant issues of life

Don’t get yourself into a tissy over the small problems in life: the gnats of everyday. Just ask yourself: what experience would you like to have, and is it in your power to have it? Then make the changes.

Wednesday, 9/4/2019 8:40 a.m.

Sitting outside, beautiful day.  My inside on the other hand is a bit torn up, because I am dealing with issues about the house (again, daily) plus work… Oh well, that’s life!  Wait, did I just say that or you, Club?  (laughing).

So I am getting a theme:  Life will have invariantly issues to deal with.

Seems like a good topic.  So… tuning in, listening to the birds, sipping my coffee “mindfully”…

The Club:  We are here.

OK, it’s an interesting topic: “invariantly, issues will be there.” So, anything to say to this?

Well, it’s almost a definition of life. As we said so often, you cannot just have the good, but with the process of living come, invariantly, good and bad moments, or at least so it may seem.  For good and bad is but a judgment.  And that is precisely the point: to live through and experience these moments, deemed by YOU as bad.  For another soul configuration living through the same life space might see it all differently.  So this is YOUR unique experience of the given moment.

So, no pep talk about “you can do this” and alike (smiling)?

You know better by now, don’t you?  You know, it is all how you look at these “invariant issues.” Case in point, how you have come to dealing with these house issues as just another “nuisance” instead of some major catastrophe.

Not that I ever used to see it as a catastrophe.

Yes, but you were (and are) stressing yourself out about it.

OK.  So where does it leave all this?

Well, back to the topic. You know that it takes but a change in viewpoint.

Right, but THAT is exactly what is sometimes hard to do.

Soften the stance, accept the situation.  Did you not write so much about this !? [in my first book, The Steps of Essence]

Yes, and it mostly works. Certainly for these invariant “little” issues.  Of course, something big, like Heather’s murder, is an altogether different thing.

Sure.  Here, the whole ground was pulled away under your and B.’s world. And that takes adjustment; the process of grief takes time.  Yet, you saw again, when you wrote about Heather’s star, how a change of viewpoint made you look at the story differently.  It is not “that she is a star,” but that she is laughing, and wants you to look at the stars differently.  

Correct.  Since I wrote it, I have looked up at the sky at night, at the stars (it has been very clear the last few days) and instead of feeling melancholic, I smiled at them – or with them, you understand.

Right.  So it’s the same with all these invariant issues, for virtually all of these are just day-to-day issues.  Sure, you can deem them as bad, and then live as though they are, and get stressed out and whatnot.  Or just see them as invariant issues, day to day stuff, that really should not be anything in the grand scheme of things:  Gnats of the everyday – so to speak.  [gnats are tiny little flies]

Take notice, and take care of them, but don’t turn gnats into an elephant. 

House issues ?  Those are Gnats!
Dealing with murder is a bigger thing.
Put it in perspective.

OK, than you, this helps.

Oh yeah, you/we just had this  through: “Don’t sweat the small stuff.” That’s exactly it!  But then again, it IS YOUR LIFE, and any way you do it is your experience.

Just ask yourself:  what experience would you like to have, and is it in your power to have it.  With most everyday items it really is just like a choice, a change of viewpoint.  With others, rare ones, like the whole murder thing, it’s harder, yet after a while it becomes “chooseable” as well as far as how much you hold on to…

She is always here, never gone, you know that!?


On that note, time to move on to this day, right?  Your energy is waning.

Yes, until next time.

Namaste — I and the Divine in me bow to You and the Divine in You.

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