I dedicate this site to the memory of my stepdaughter, Heather, who was murdered on Thanksgiving 2017. I want to chronicle some of the events and spiritual insights that happened. It is my hope that this may help some other souls who stumble upon this site. Maybe some good can come off this after all (read more here). ~ May 2018
Steps of Essence
You are a superhero. Yes, it’s true – and you don’t have to wear a cape or a mask to be one. You already are, just by being you. For once upon a time, you took the plunge into life. At the moment of your conception there were a thousand other potential versions of you vying for this life, that is, a thousand male seeds trying to merge with that one female ovum. Each other combination would have produced a different biological “you.” But only YOU made it. Only you, uniquely you, took the plunge into life. That’s the jump of a hero. You already are a life hero!
What really is a miracle? If miracles were more common, would we still call them miracles? As I explain in “The Steps of Essence,” the words miracle and mirage are related and they imply feeling a sense of wonder. So ask yourself: what instills a real sense of wonderment in you? Is it something grand like Jesus walking on water? Or how about a woman with an injured spinal cord who was told by the doctors that she would never walk again, and yet does. Is that a miracle? What about our ability to feel love?
We all fail from time to time—-that is only human. The question is, how do you handle these failures? In the worst case, a single failure can be so devastating that a whole life becomes woven around it. Then it is no longer "I failed at such and such" but "my whole life is a failure" or even "I am a failure!" A related case if is somebody else has failed you and you cannot get over this. In either case, you may feel a deep disappointment or maybe even depression. But it does not have to be like that – in fact, the whole notion of failure is incorrect. Let’s see why.
In The Steps of Essence I encourage people to dream big and to be great. In fact, I believe we all are great beings already--just by being born and being unique. But greatness is not enough; instead it is very much about how you are being great about your life: you can either brag about your greatness, or be humble about it. Each way will make a great difference to your own life and the lives of others.
When you’re struggling with some emotional problem, like for example anxiety, depression, or momentary anger, what can you do to get past this? Modern psychology offers many ways to resolve such issues. Some of the most widely used techniques work on changing your thoughts; other more recent approaches stress acceptance and mindfulness. In this article we’ll look at some of these ways that can help you.
“What is the meaning of life?” This is one of the biggest questions we can ask. Many great minds have tackled it. For me, the most insightful answer came from Victor Frankl, a famous Psychologist who also was a Holocaust survivor. In his influential book “Man’s Search for Meaning” he describes the horrors of the Nazi concentration camp and how he was able to survive by focusing on the few things he had left, which could not be stripped from him and that gave him meaning, such as the love for his wife (who had been separated from him, and, as he found out only later, killed).